Anxiety symptoms range from feeling depressed to cranky.
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Door slams, tantrums, unexpected tears, and one-sided conversations at the dinner table. If these are common in your family, you may be raising a teenager.
Teenagers are often thought of as entitled children with little or no control over their emotions. Although many parents may view this as unnecessary anxiety or rebellion, it may be a sign of a child struggling with anxiety.
“It’s so overwhelming and so powerful that you’re really caught up in the storm,” said Natasha Riard, a clinical psychology lecturer and psychology clinic manager at James Cook University in Singapore. “The anxiety has taken over you. mind and body.
“The person experiencing anxiety wants it to stop, and the parents watching it want it to stop. But once a panic attack occurs, it’s like a train that has left the station and won’t stop until it reaches the next stop.” First, these stops. The journey between the points is the experience of the attack,” Riad explains.
Psychologists say parents may not always know how to help their children when they are anxious or on the verge of an anxiety attack, and what worked in the past may no longer be useful as teens face new challenges.
Here’s how parents can better detect signs of anxiety in their children, along with suggestions for helping their children.
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Psychologists say that regardless of age, people who feel anxious can have a fight, flight, freeze or please response to stressful situations.
They told CNBC that the most common reactions are flight and freezing, which is showing signs of panic, starting to cry or shake, or even freezing and disengaging from things by becoming silent and disconnected.
“When you have a panic attack, you may be truly afraid of what is happening to you. The way you perceive reality may shift, and it can be a very scary experience,” says Yale Child Study Center on Anxiety and Mood Disorders Project Director.
Like adults, teenagers can have a fight response when they feel anxious, which is often misunderstood as a tantrum or tantrum.
“Parents need to think about the meaning behind their children slamming doors and yelling. Are they anxious about something?” Riad said, emphasizing that this is just another expression of anxiety.
Psychologists say they have also noticed “fawn reactions” in children where they suffer from “fawn syndrome”.Ability to maintain normal daily life despite poor mental health.
Psychologist Lisa Coloca says: “Young people often avoid their feelings and try to look busy in chaotic situations to make it look like everything is okay. You are in their face Or what they see in their behavior may not be what is going on in their hearts.
Yale’s Lebowitz said some signs parents should watch for include shortness of breath, stiffness and changes in skin color. He added that while an anxiety attack may seem scary and uncontrollable, it is not dangerous and parents should not “panic”.
Top Tips for Helping Anxious Teens
1. Validate their feelings
Experts suggest that parents often underestimate, and sometimes ignore, the challenges their children face and the emotions they feel.
“Stop using adult brains to solve teenagers’ problems. Telling them ‘it’s going to be okay’ isn’t going to help because they don’t feel good at the time,” says Michel, another psychologist and director of the Bloom Psychology Group. Michelle Savage says and Bloom Community.
When children share their concerns with their parents, comfort is not always the answer.
“From a parent’s perspective, we want to protect our children from pain. But another solution is to think of it as a cue to let your child express her emotions and fears, and to listen,” James Cook Riad said.
Parents should also note that children don’t always need advice, but often they just want to be seen and heard.
“Validating that your child is anxious won’t make them more anxious,” says Yale’s Lebowitz. “It will make them feel understood and more likely to talk to you about it in the future.” Getting Rid of Childhood Anxiety and obsessive-compulsive disorder.
“Parents should work to communicate to their child that they accept and validate their child’s real fear or pain and have confidence in their child’s ability to cope with that pain,” he added. He elaborated that this will help build confidence and gradually reduce Fear or pain.
2. Share personal experience
When a child or teen feels anxious, it often helps to know that they are not alone.
Sharing personal stories of people in similar situations will help them realize that it is possible to overcome the adversity they face.
“Parents need to normalize this and talk about their own internal dialogue around anxiety, while being mindful of open communication in a non-threatening way,” Savage advises.
For example, telling your child that you were anxious about the slides for a big presentation at work, but reassuring yourself that you did your best, will help your child feel seen and heard.
“It’s very difficult to teach your children to regulate and cope with all emotions if you can’t do it yourself. Be willing to talk about your emotions, and not just the positive ones,” Leibovitz says. “And start early, don’t wait until your child is 15 to start doing this.”
Psychologists who spoke to CNBC also emphasized that parents should not share “significant and inappropriate” issues with their children, such as financial difficulties or marital challenges.
3. Timing is everything
When your child is anxious or is having an anxiety attack, the last thing they need is advice on how to solve the problem.
“Don’t expect your child to be able to talk about it when they’re extremely anxious. You have to give them some time to calm down,” advises Yale’s Leibovitz.
Conversations about how to better manage emotions must not occur during moments of anxiety, but before. Psychologists suggest that giving children space while also letting them know you’re nearby if they need a helping hand can also be helpful.
“We often put a lot of pressure on children to self-regulate and use psychological strategies to help themselves. But in those moments, children and teens really need adults to regulate with them,” Riad said, explaining that parents can Help children become aware of their thoughts and emotions and how they affect behavior.
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